There’s something a little troublesome about telling someone where you live when you happen to be somebody like me, a resident of the tri-state area [In the US, when one says "the tri-state area," they are usually referring to New York, New Jersey and Connecticut]. But it isn’t quite as simple as that, see.
The very nature of how people work and live in the tri-state makes it quite difficult to state where exactly you are “from” when somebody outside the area asks you the mandatory question. Take somebody like me. I spend close to 12 of my waking hours in mid-town Manhattan on work days (which is a fancy way of saying that I work in the city). However, I do actually live in New Jersey – the butt of jokes on Seinfeld and every second person I come across who lives in the big dumps that most parts of Queens and Brooklyn are – making it quite hard for me to answer that question, something I usually am asked (naturally) when I’m visiting other parts of the country.
Of course, it doesn’t help that there is the clearly evident social strata that people fall into based on where they live. New Jersey is the absolute pits. Better than that is living in Brooklyn, Queens or Long Island, for that matter. And of course, the most exalted of all, the Manhattaner (did I just coin that word ?). Somewhere in those rungs figure Connecticut residents, who can only be found running in and out of Grand Central on 42 St 
It must be noted that this social stratification automatically applies to you only if you live in one state and work in another. If you live and work in NJ, you are out of the scene, brother, sorry
So coming back to the question. What do I say when somebody actually asks me where I’m from ? [I am automatically assuming that they refer to where I am based in the US - I would hardly want to challenge their geography by giving the real answer to the question where I truly consider myself to be from - Hyderabad]
I could tell them that I live in the tri-state area but that would make me look like Ford Prefect in ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’ – who is from another planet and is marooned in England I could give them all the technicalities of how I live on the river and commute into the city and yada yada, but that would be such a mouthful that if I was in a club or bar talking to some pretty girl, my chances would have been shot
So it’s easy to tell people from out of town that I am based in New York, which is an entirely accurate statement. Now, it isn’t quite the same thing to say that to somebody who is from the same area or has lived here before. No sooner do the words leave your mouth than they pounce upon you.
“Ah, so you live in New Jersey! That’s cool. What’s your commute like ?”
What they really mean is, “Oh you poor-unfortunate-soul-who-has-to-spend-4-hours-commuting-from-some-dull-area-in-NJ. You are so missing out on life in the city.”
“Oh, it’s like 25 minutes. I live on the waterfront so it’s really quick to come into the city pretty often,” I inform them. This usually invokes a startled reaction because the least thing they expect is that you get to live the life that they shell out thousands of dollars in exorbitant rent on apartments , not half as big as your bathroom, for. Since the conversation cannot possibly proceed in the usual way, it comes to an abrupt end. It’s the same story if you let out “201″ from your mouth when giving somebody your phone number.
The truth is that most parts of New Jersey are really a dump, I make no bones about it. I am perfectly happy living where I am though (on the beautiful waterfront area) – just that all you have to do is be resigned to people thinking the way they do, about New Jersey.
I recently discovered that there’s another breed of people. The former-Manhattaner-now-living-in-New-Jersey. This species is forever repenting his/her move to NJ. All they can ever do is rant about the city and spend most of their energy cursing the roads and the expressways and everything they can lay their eyes on in NJ. They hate NJ with all their heart but are unsure why they moved there in the first place.
To be fair to New Yorkers, living in the city is indeed an experience that is unique for most Americans. But if you think about it, living in NYC is really quite like living in the big cities in India like Mumbai. NYC is noisy, dirty and overcrowded. The drivers are possibly the worst in the world and the pedestrians flout the rules as vehemently as the drivers themselves. In other words, this city is one big city full of traffic violators
How would somebody from London, like my friend Matt Alcock be expected to know all this ? There he was in a NYC club chatting up some pretty ladies with his wonderful British accent and he goes (after some other bits of conversation),
“So do you girls live in New Jersey ?”
He never heard from those girls again.
